Vortex

It’s amazing to see just how much one can improve in the span of a couple of years. I recently found this old fractal in my files, and decided to update it to reflect my current skill level.

The mystery of the vortex has been in this piece right from the start though, and no amount of technical proficiency could have compensated for the lack of that. Revisiting the past reminds me of how magical the whole process felt back then. Being able to even create something at all, having complete control over this tiny universe within an editor. It was exhilarating, and my writings from that time reflect that breathlessness, the complete amazement at my newly found passion.

I’ve grown up a lot since then, but once thing I promise myself is to never lose that sense of childlike wonder. It’s the stuff life is made from.

Echo

A faint echo comes from a strange but familiar place. From deep within, it whispers, starting a quiet revolution of thought. Can a single day go by without being changed by it?

Focus

A gaze that shifts into deep focus, looking beyond the imaginable. What does it see, I wonder?

Balance

In the center of two opposing forces, a strange equilibrium is formed…

If what you envision doesn’t exist, build it

Over most of this year, I’ve been buried in a cave creatively speaking, only coming out occasionally to let everyone know I’m still here. So what have I been doing all this time? I just finished building my very own fractal editor, which turned out to be a much bigger undertaking than I expected. But we’ve finally arrived at our 1.0 beta version. Looking back, all the effort put in has been worth it.

I wanted to have a tool for creating fractals that would be helpful rather than hindering, where the countless little details that go into design were done right. That tool didn’t exist, so I set out to build it. While the result is far from perfect, I dare say that it’s a good chunk closer than what I previously had to work with. I fully support the philosophy behind the open source movement, and contributing my own little drop into that ocean has been an immensely satisfying experience.

https://launchpad.net/fr0st/+download

Enjoy!

The Spider’s Portrait

Capturing the essence of a living being in a piece of abstract art is an incredibly difficult task. That doesn’t prevent me from trying, of course! The real point of course is connecting with the subject, rather than the final result. I’m pleased that she turned out looking so… alive.

The Spider

A spider glides down from the ceiling and lands on my desk.

I’m afraid, I want to kill this little creature; she dares to suggest the possibility of being able to hurt me. What if she bites me? While I am sitting and writing, lying and sleeping; I won’t share my home with a poisonous animal.

Fear is the strangest thing. It makes us ruin our life and that of others, desperately trying to avoid precisely such ruin. But it’s not the only option.

Without hesitation, she makes her way towards my keyboard, walks straight over it, and hangs herself from the border of the desk, where she remains suspended in the air.

I’m taken aback, I gaze at this little creature; she dares to suggest the possibility of beauty, wonder and compassion. While I am sitting and writing, lying and sleeping, I share my home with an angel.

She poses herself on the ground. A sound outside distracts me. When I look again, she’s gone.

Pulse

(Click to see larger version)

Below all layers, below even the deepest barriers we use to keep us from ourselves, life keeps pulsing, keeps living, keeps singing; oblivious to our needless complications.

Gentle Power

Power doesn’t have to be violent; it can be soft and gentle. It doesn’t have to be about domination; it can be about respect – for yourself and others. Tap into that source of inner power. Stripped of false associations, it is a beautiful thing to behold.

Going Vegan

It’s been a while since I’ve posted non-fractal stuff on this blog, but I feel that I need to make myself publicly accountable for this.

In the month of september, I will eat a 100% vegan diet.

There. I’ve been considering to change my diet for quite a while, but there was always something “more important” I chose to focus my energy on. One of the biggest obstacles of eating a non-standard diet is that the entire social structure is constantly pressing against your decision. A couple of years ago, I tried going vegetarian, but found it hard to keep up mostly because I had a normal job back then, which added even further to that pressure with lots of lunches, meetings, and events.

Early this year, when I finally gave up my job to become a freelancer, I meant to give it another try, but somehow always kept pushing it off. The excuse was that I wanted to get used to my new working environment first, and the inertia generated by that decision carried the habit forward another 6 months unquestioned.

I’m putting an end to that right now. It took a not-so-gentle reminder popping up in my feed reader, even if I already knew all the arguments for making a switch. My reasons for this decisions are three-fold:

1) Nutritional: Some people say that humans are made to eat meat; others say that we are vegans by nature. I’ve eaten meat my entire life, so it’s only fair to see how it’s like to be on the other side of the debate.

2) Environmental: Do you seriously think that deforestation happens because you printed one too many pages of paper? That’s absurd. The paper industry plants trees just as fast as they raze them. Forests recede when cows take their place. Eating fruits and vegetables is orders of magnitude more efficient than eating meat, simply because a very low percentage of the energy animals consume is actually converted to meat, the rest being lost to side effects such as growing bones, keeping their body temperature and emitting greenhouse gases.

3) Ethical: It’s nice to pretend you’re not responsible for the things you are (directly or indirectly) paying other people to do for you, but that just isn’t true, and I’m not willing to ignore it any longer. I’m not against eating meat per se, but rather against the horrible practices of the industries involved (see video in the link above). If my personal ethics prevent me from mercilessly torturing and killing animals, they must also prevent me from allowing others to do it on my behalf.

I don’t know whether this experiment will turn into a permanent change. I’m giving myself permission to return to my old habits after september is over.