I know I’ve been very quiet lately. This doesn’t mean I’ve lost my creative spirit or anything, quite the contrary! Going to college has (re)awoken my interest in so many topics and ideas that I can barely keep up. In that process, my publishing of fractal art has been neglected, though I’ve been very active in learning more about different kinds of fractals, approaching them from a mathematical point of view that wasn’t really accessible to me in the past.
What I’m really saying is that I’ve been in a deep introspective / learning phase, and though I’ve made a lot of progress and broke down a couple of significant mental barriers that were holding me back, that process has resulted in little tangible results (for now!), which is a strange feeling.
I have accumulated lots of half-finished artwork produced in bits of spare time here and there, so you will start seeing more updates to this blog as soon as I get around to finishing up some of them. No promises though!
Yeah! It’s good to be posting stuff again… this has been one of my longer absences. Studying is lots of work, and things like this poor little blog tend to fall by the wayside. However, the absence of creative flow in my life makes itself felt after a while. It feels strange to make a fractal I’m proud of and neglect to show it to you guys, leaving it to gather virtual dust on my hard drive. I can almost feel the bytes lingering, blocking my creative energies. I’d never do that deliberately, of course, at least not consciously… therein lies the problem.
This is a good description of my life right now. So much going on behind the scenes, so many options to explore, it overwhelms me sometimes.
My love for fractals hasn’t diminished in any way. In fact, I’m busily working on my own fractal editor, which is such an absorbing undertaking at times that I forget the reason I arrived at this point in the first place is that I’m an artist.
A strange paradox to be living in, but somehow appropriate when you consider the medium I’m working in.
Into this fractal garden you can always retreat, surrounding yourself in calm, dim light and listen to the deepest heartbeat of the world, to the rhythm that sweeps you away gently into your own dance, your own ritual; unique yet connected to the steady pounding of this inner core.
This place is real, I can feel it deep within me. So can you, if you only care to listen to the subtle but constant drum that marks this most sacred spot, the very center of the world.
I’ve been incredibly busy these past weeks: I moved, went out of town over the long weekend (Chilean national holidays), and have been devoting my attention to the half-dozen or so ideas and projects I have cooking right now.
But this place, the fractal forest, is still very important to me, and as I’ve said before, not having more than 5 minutes is no excuse to stop posting.
The Gallery should receive some more fractals over the next couple of days, and I’m really thrilled at the quality the prints turned out to have. In the meantime, I’ll be posting my most recent works here.
This is one I’m particularly proud of, it resembles a flower made of smoke in a strange way. There’s something magical about it.
(Click to enlarge and to save as wallpaper)
Sometimes, it’s reality that fades away when confronted by your dreams. Which side prevails, the rougher, more real one or the subtleties of the imagination – that is just a matter of perspective.
They’re not always meant to be solved. I think the most interesting part of being human is having no idea what it all means. Things just are, and you can’t prove any of it to exist. Even questioning is a paradox, the paradox itself is a paradox, ad nauseam. It’s called being too smart for your own good, letting your mind take over when it has no idea what to do when encountering anything that doesn’t fit nicely into its own illusions.
But I question the validity of all these logical constructs and black holes of thought: What happens when your mind has collapsed entirely? Where does the strenght to keep living come from? There’s something else there, beyond all this existential angst.
These circumstances don’t have to dampen your joy of living. It’s definitively not a productive way to spend your time.
At the end of each day, even if you still find yourself utterly clueless, unable to comprehend even the tiniest sliver of existence, you can still choose curiosity instead of fear, wonder instead of despair. And that is, to sum it up, why I believe in divinity.
(Click image to enlarge)
It’s amazing how doing something yourself instead of just observing it can deepen your understanding of that thing tremendously. Above are 6 screenshots of fractals generated by a tiny program I wrote using only 153 bytes, which is 1000 times less than the size of the image itself! When stripped to the bare essentials, there’s really not that much to an iterated function system (the process behind the creation of a fractal).
Nowadays, computers provide the structure which carries an amazing amount of the human soul in it – communication, expression, creativity, connectedness. It might just be an external manifestation of the major shift towards freedom humanity is experiencing.
With that in mind, I have to tell you: the first time you run a program which actually makes the computer do exactly what you intended, creating something meaningful out of a bunch of dead numbers and instructions, it feels a bit like being god.
So-called insanity occasionally takes over my life, and I’m quite proud of that fact. One of the latest creative bursts I had involved Python swallowing me whole for a couple of weekends, capturing me with its intricacy until the break of dawn. While I don’t know exactly what will come out of my newfound ability to write hacky code, fractals have already been thrown into the mix – as a prime ingredient no less.
The point this ultimately brings me to is one of passion: Truly great things never happen without it. They don’t happen when there’s a clearly defined plan, when everything is laid out. They don’t happen at a relaxed pace, or even a 9-5 hectic one. No, what we need is something entirely different. Something which can’t be forced.
Letting my mind wander for no apparent purpose, having the opportunity to explore things I’m curious about (just because), gives me the chance to refill my creative well and let it spill out over all areas of my life. Even if its practical applications were not clear from the beginning, finally being able to program a bit is actually a childhood dream come true. Isn’t that what we life for, after all? And it might just be the secret to make things happen.
I just can’t bring myself to see the moon as a pale white or yellow entity. For me, it has a very full, deep, red-and-blue feel to it.
Except for the few times it does humor me on this point of contention, I am forced to recur to my artistic tools to make that fanciful vision just a tad more real. Makes you wonder what “real” ultimately means, doesn’t it?