Passion or Balance?

So-called insanity occasionally takes over my life, and I’m quite proud of that fact. One of the latest creative bursts I had involved Python swallowing me whole for a couple of weekends, capturing me with its intricacy until the break of dawn. While I don’t know exactly what will come out of my newfound ability to write hacky code, fractals have already been thrown into the mix - as a prime ingredient no less.

The point this ultimately brings me to is one of passion: Truly great things never happen without it. They don’t happen when there’s a clearly defined plan, when everything is laid out. They don’t happen at a relaxed pace, or even a 9-5 hectic one. No, what we need is something entirely different. Something which can’t be forced.

Letting my mind wander for no apparent purpose, having the opportunity to explore things I’m curious about (just because), gives me the chance to refill my creative well and let it spill out over all areas of my life. Even if its practical applications were not clear from the beginning, finally being able to program a bit is actually a childhood dream come true. Isn’t that what we life for, after all? And it might just be the secret to make things happen.

Purple Moon

I just can’t bring myself to see the moon as a pale white or yellow entity. For me, it has a very full, deep, red-and-blue feel to it.

Except for the few times it does humor me on this point of contention, I am forced to recur to my artistic tools to make that fanciful vision just a tad more real. Makes you wonder what “real” ultimately means, doesn’t it?

Self Censorship

Learning how and when to censor yourself is very important when developing any artistic skill. The way you go at this process can have a huge impact in your skill. I try to keep my learning curve steady and steep, in a way that actually makes it enjoyable and worthwhile. In that sense, it’s important to allow myself to go in different directions, and knowing when an experiment is proving worthwhile.

I see a lot of people telling themselves that their work is not good enough. Most of the time, that’s just not true. There is always something worthwile to be found, even if it’s hard to spot at first. True skill lies in laying that something bare, stripping it of all fat and needless filler, and be confident enough to put it out into the world. That skill is what makes true artists.

Path of Spirit

Do you often focus on your goals, your target, imagining the life you want to be living? I know I lose myself that way from time to time - that’s why I’m writing this piece right now. I’m tired of running in circles, chasing ill defined measures of “success”.

The path of spirit is not as straight as your mind would have you believe.

Lately I’ve started challenging all the definitions and preconceptions floating around in my head, and they have slowly given rise to some very interesting questions: Do I even need to define a destination, and end to my path? Isn’t that besides the point of living, isn’t every step along the way a worthy place to reach?

Why does the notion of already being where we need to be sound so absurd to the logical mind? Why are we unable to just stop and look around?

If you narrow your own view to the point where you can only see straight ahead it can surely turn you into an efficient machine, but it also makes you miss all the beauty present in life. This world is surprisingly malleable - whenever you’re not sure where you’re going, all you have to do is to set one foot before the other with intention, and a new way will form itself before you.

Never be afraid of straying a bit. When you walk all paths of life as if they were only one, you will never get lost.

The Meaning of Symbols

I had a discussion recently over at Koldo Barroso’s site, regarding one of his pieces which had a very strong symbolic meaning for me, which was apparently never intended by the author.

In response to my comment, he mentioned:

I usually get an image in my head and later I add a text or a story to it, ’cause I’m more of a painter rather than a writer. So, the image comes to my head, I don’t think of the image in terms of symbols, but later it can be interpreted.

This answer illustrates a rather curious fact. Why is it that we are always looking for meaning and symbolism in everything we see? Is it not right for a work of art to exist just for it’s own sake, without necessarily transmitting a message?

I’ve curiously fallen into this habit too. The fractal images I create based on chaotic principles always start out as a blank slate, dots littering the screen, just being dots. However, as soon as I start arranging them in a specific order, a meaning emerges. The chaos becomes something more; all of a sudden it stands for a concept, a state of mind, or even a mythical creature.

I guess all of this just proves that we are fundamentally creative beings, that we choose our own meaning for things whenever we can’t find any. But is the meaning of anything even there, before we take our very first look at it?

Ultimately, it’s just the other half of our joint creative act taking place, don’t you think?

Into the Darkness

Have you ever dared to descend deep into your own self? Going down into the earth, submerging yourself in the dense matter of the unconscious instead of floating high up towards your imagination? It’s dark down here, and a bit scary.

I’ve been gradually pulling back out from the blogosphere - it’s not the time for me to be doing this very actively. I’m spread too thin as it stands. Don’t worry though, I’m still here. It’s just that right now, there are some private victories to be won - there will be time for the public ones later.

What bothers me the most is the fact that I have so many projects swirling around in my head, so much art I haven’t had a chance to share with you. For now I’m keeping it all with me, hanging from my neck on a pendrive, encasing these energies I hold so dear like a crystal, saving them for a time they’re ready. Perhaps they’ll light me the way. It’s dark down here, and a bit scary.

Building a Solid Foundation

There’s something that can be said about the depth of shadows and style that come out in an image when you remove the clutter of too much bright coloration. Doing a black & white fractal like this once in a while really brings me back to the core of art.

I love complex, elaborate works (be they books, movies, games, images) but if the central expressive force can’t stand on its own, the rest is just wasted effort. I’ve been adjusting my own direction lately, and while my external projects might not seem to be moving along very fast, my internal structures are changing at an alarming rate, placing the foundation for great things to come.

This principle applies to everybody, all the time. You may think you have nothing going on right now, but there will always be a project of utmost importance on your plate: the unfolding of your own life, the creative expression of your soul. Don’t let it crumble under its own weight.

So how does your foundation look? Right now it may not make a difference, but a few years down the road it will be crystal clear what kind of heart your project had. Don’t confuse embelishment with good craft, don’t let your “creativity”, “vision” or “plans” get in the way of building solidly, from the ground up.

Does Beauty need an Explanation?

I don’t think she does.

Beauty is fundamentally subjective, and no explanation does her justice. Just let her flow right into you, let the seed she carries be planted. Soon, you’ll discover that an unexplicable spark - usually only noticed in those rare moments you seem more awake than usual - is present everywhere, whispering to your senses. What a joy life becomes when you find that spark!

Always in progress

You’ll find plenty of colorful images on this site. However, only the fewest (perhaps this one or that other one) could actually be called “complete”, and only in the sense that I’m not likely to be tinkering with them for the time being. The rest of them are merely studies, scribbles, sketches, experiments, representations. A tiny sliver of who I was at that moment, frozen in time through little pieces of data, nothing more.

I don’t keep a gallery. This site is closer in nature to an atelier, a studio. I invite you to come in here and look at my work while it’s wet, fresh and authentic. I love blogs because they’re the perfect medium for this vision: Always in progress, always changing, always evolving. It’s the only constant in art, and in life.

Things are changing

The last few days have turned a large part of my life upside down. Externally, everything is looking normal, business as usual. However, I feel like a totally different person. It’s true that my time tends to be rather limited, but I’m not kidding myself: There are several posts in my mind that need to be written (lest they fade into the ether again), but I have been stalling whenever I actually had the time to sit down in front of a keyboard. That period has come to an end though, the ingredients have been fermenting far too long, it’s time for me to start spinning them into something different. Definitely coming soon.

I have been very active making fractals at least, and I’m wondering how many of you would be interested if I put them up as free wallpapers, considering that I now have several gigas of free space here at wordpress.com, and could easily put them on a separate page on my blog.

So, if you would like to grace your desktop with these little fragments of beautiful chaos, now is your time to speak up by leaving a comment. I’ll try to make specific images available per request.

Here’s a little teaser of things to come, hope it inspires you as much as it did me.